These are a few of my favorite things ...

Taking a note from my dear friend Jessi's book, I am naming today "Friday Favorites" ... These are things I cannot live without.  No, even more, they are things I WILL not live without.  As in, it's not an option.

Where to start ... there seem to be quite a few things (aside from the obvious .. Emi, Mike, Dexy, Pixie, Sera .. my friends, my family ...) these things are material.  And in most cases, immaterial to actual daily survival - for most.  Not for me.

The first being - my camera.  Though I have been without it for a few weeks now, for no other reason than rushing in the morning, I have a fantastic camera.  It's a Kodak Digital Camera.  But it's not one of those sleek, fit in your pocket, miniature type - easy to use digital cameras - this one is relatively beefy.  Which is just one of the things I love about it.  I also, I'm so old fashioned, have a Pentax 35 mm camera.  Yep ... the film taking kind ... I love it.  I carry that with me on our weekend jaunts. (that we've been too busy to take as of late, though that's going to change - we will be taking one soon.)

Next - a book - any book, whatever I'm reading at the moment, or haven't yet read.  I always always always have a book with me.  Usually, it's a different book, just about every day - given the speed at which I devour books.

Moving on - I have a small, tiny actually, bottle of "Cool Citrus Basil" Bath and Body Works body lotion.  It's one of my favorites.  It's a clean, light smell, that doesn't make my skin itch, or burn, or turn bright red like most scented lotions are known to do.  I believe, actually this scent has been discontinued - thus the reason I always have it on me.

Then we have Softlips.  MmmHmmm, you know the stuff - mostly I stick to the "Strawberry" kind, which is increasingly hard to find now a days - I have found them only at Target - in two packs, and will happily shell out the nearly 4 dollars for my addiction.  There is really no other term for it, I am addicted, hopelessly addicted to this "lip protectant" (as they call it) ... if I cannot find strawberry, I will sink to the "cherry" level.  I know, It's an illness.  One that I am not ready to either face, or cure - as the case may be.

Also, my cell phone - which now, thank you Mom and Dad - has access to the internet (hooray!) ... it also doubles as a camera, though the pictures aren't the greatest, it takes video too! 

There are also "normal" necessities - Advil, Tylenol, benedryl, pens, checkbooks, nail file, wallet, "girlie products", band aides, neosporin, Tide to Go Pen ... I also have necessities for Emily - motrin, Tylenol, benedryl - poor girl is allergic to bug bites, they swell up and give her fevers -- mosquitoes, black flies, spiders, doesn't matter - all of em.  Which, as some of you know, living in New England is a year round issue.  Makes life a lot of fun!  Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, I know I am blessed, and I know am among the lucky.  

All these things are normal, in a sense - but I also have the "abnormal" ... I have a word search book, a highlighter, straws (lots of places don't have kids cups), as well as post it notes, a sharpie (or three, in varying colors), white out ... as well as a few other odds and ends.  

Without these - essential things - at any given time (apparently, however my camera doesn't count this month) - I am liable to feel, naked - vulnerable - and as though a part of me is missing.  It's weird, isn't it?  For a person who, up until last year, never once carried a purse - and still frequently leaves without one - to need all of this ... STUFF ... weird, and yet, comforting.

I'm normal, I'm a woman, I am a mom, I need STUFF.

What do you need?

Bloggers Block

Have you ever had a day, or several days strung in a row really, where you can sit, and stare at a blank screen, or blank sheet of paper - you know you have to write, you know you have something to say - and that it'll be profound - to ... someone - yet, you can't?

You know there's something there, something begging to be told - a story, a memory, a moment - and just when you start to write it out, it jets away.  Buries itself deep in the recess of your mind, and laughs at you - tormenting you with flashes, and brief recollection.  Nasty bugger.

I've had a month like that, well, just about a month.   Ever since I said New Month, New Outlook?  Yep.  Can't think of a single thing worth writing about.  Not one thing I think anyone would be interested in.  I mean, there are things - memories, stories, silly things - but I can't seem to recall a single one.  How does that happen?  More so, why does it happen?  Especially when I really NEED to write, I NEED to focus my attention on something worthy of it.   Gotta love it!

To find inspiration, in an attempt to beat this bloggers block, I have been pouring through my hard drive, external hard drive and photo bucket accounts ... looking at photos, remembering the circumstances surrounding the picture, and then it hits me.  I haven't taken my camera with me, in 3 weeks.  I don't have my extension.  It's at home, plugged in, empty.  Void of photos.  Not only do I have bloggers block, I have photographers block.  I need some quality photo taking time.

Apparently, my new month, new outlook has fallen victim to my SAD funk, and it angers me.  Angers me enough - that this evening, I'll be taking a walk, with camera, small one, and possibly the dogs (if it's not too cold - Pixie won't move in certain temperatures) ... and I'm going to snap away.  I'm also going to hopefully, continue losing pant sizes.  I'd enjoy it immensely if I lost maybe 2 more.  Happy I've lost the one, and am greedy to give away more.

I appreciate, faithful readers, that you have stuck by me in my funk time.  And I do promise, I shall be back to blogging ... fun ... things in the near future.

For now, I bid you adieu, heh, that word always makes me laugh.

Nursing a Sick Minion ...

As you may, or may not, have noticed - I have been lacking in the writing department.  I apologize.   Since we still don't have internet at home - the only time I get to enjoy it, is here at work.  Last week, I was in my office on Tuesday - Mike decided to stay home with Emily, so that I could get some things done at work.  Wednesday, we dropped her off at Daycare, and hoped she would last the entire day.  She didn't.  I picked her up, around 2:30, 3pm, and headed home.  

Poor baby, she had an alternating fever, and icky belly, since Monday of last week  -  off and on for the ENTIRE week.  Ranging from as low as 99.1 to as high as 102.9 - it was one of the roughest weeks, since she was an infant.   Nothing helped - the lukewarm baths, the tylenol (she couldn't alternate with the Motrin, because of her tummy) ... we had a doctors appointment, finally - on Thursday afternoon, and had every test imaginable, to determine just what was causing her fever.  We found nothing.  She had the "nasty stomach flu virus" that has been making it's rounds lately.   The fever?  Not a part of that, just an added bonus for my benefit it seems.

After yet another sleepless night, Emily and I got up, ran to the ATM - paid for daycare - because yes, even though she wasn't there for the ENTIRE week, we had to pay for it - and then had breakfast at J&J's.  My mom was home sick that day too, and she never misses work for a sick day.  The virus?  Is that nasty.   I hope none of you get it.  Ever.

While we were home, we had some good "project time" ... where we made crafty things, and some good snuggle time - we watched "Hook" about a MILLION times, as well as a few other silly movies - my personal favorite "Bedtime Stories" - of which we watched 18 minutes - and she fell asleep.  ;)  Next time, we'll remember what makes her sleepy.

It appears as if she's over the worst, and is back to daycare today, thankfully - though it seems that Daddy may be the next victim of this lovely 'bug' ... anyway, that's what I've been up to for the last week, once I get caught up here at work - I'll post again.

Love ya all!!

The Story Of Us ...

Nearly 10 years ago, I started dating a boy.  He was older than me, we psuedo-worked together, he was shy, I was bitchy ... it seemed impossible that we would last much more than a month.  It didn't help that we started "officially dating" on April1st.

After making it past the "year" mark - we moved in together, with my cat - Rufus, who by then was nearly ancient.  A year later, we got a kitten.  We called her Serandipity.  It seemed like our life was perfect.  Of course, we had our issues, what couple doesn't?  Two years after that, he proposed ... it went something like this (if you know Mike at all, or if we've spoken of him - you'll be able to pick up his sarcasm, attitude and frustration through my writing)

To Set the Scene:

Together, with our best friends Ryan & Hilary, we decided to take a trip over New Years, and spend some time "away" - just the four of us.  After searching online for an entire evening - we settled on North Conway, NH.  "The North Conway Grand Hotel" to be exact.  In theory, it seemed like the perfect place to celebrate a "romantic" Holiday weekend away.  In retrospect, it may not have been the perfect choice.  Anyway, we booked our rooms, and started packing right away ... New Years was only a week away. 

We decided to leave after dinner, that way - we'd miss all the Holiday traffic (if any) heading North, and we'd be able to take our time, and enjoy the ride.   To make life easier, we took two cars (my pontiac, and the Jackson's (though they weren't married yet) red truck ...) and we decided to have Ryan follow us.

Half way through Ossipee, Ryan & Hilary got pulled over for speeding.  HILARIOUS to us, because we were driving just as fast - if not faster - than they were.  We pulled into a little dirt turn around to wait for them, and a few minutes later - our cell phone rang.  It was Ryan, calling to tell us they were on their way, and there was no ticket issued.  The police officer was kind, noticed Ryan's impeccable driving record and decided to let him go with a verbal warning - PHEW!!   What a start to our romantic get away!  A little bit later, and we arrived at our destination.

Apparently, every skiing family with multiple children arrived at our destination ahead of us.   Oh Wonderful, for two couples (whom at the time didn't have, or want children) this was almost - almost - a deal breaker.  We checked in, only to find the rooms we were told we'd have - weren't ready, or available once they were cleaned, they had double booked the rooms.  Because the other guests had booked 5 minutes before us, we were the ones who had to change.  So instead of having a 2 bedroom suite, with in room hot tub, mini bar and living room - we had 2 separate rooms, with queen sized beds and in room 'jacuzzi tubs' ... now, that sounds better - it sounds more romantic, however .. a jacuzzi tub?  IS NOT a hot tub!

Our rooms were not connecting either, as we had requested once we had to rebook the rooms,  their room was 2 doors down from ours, with partying 20-somethings in between ... now, I'm no slouch, and I'm no  prude - those who do recreational ... whatever ... have their own ideas of what is fun, and what is not.  These 20-somethings?  They were into recreational - A L O T ... and it made for a long, loud evening.

We decided to go "off site" for dinner, and I believe that night we went to Fandangles .. No, I am wrong, we went to the 99 - the first time we'd ever eaten there.  We had a lot of laughs, we had so many particular laughs, that Mike shot beer out his nose ... Literally Shot Beer From His Nostrils.  I don't think the 4 of us have laughed that hard since then. 

Upon returning to our hotel, we ran into - literally hundreds of kids - all under the age of 10, all unsupervised and running rampant.  We decided to purchase a bottle of Champagne, some strawberries and borrow some champagne flutes from the hotel bar, only to be told we couldn't purchase a bottle, and they were "out" of strawberries.   We instead ended up with 4 glasses of champagne, with 4 shots of chambord (or something like that) ... it was pretty tasty, and the bartender was right - better than any strawberry we could have purchased.  So we sat around our room, talking, reminicsing, planning ... and realized, our alarm clock - was 10 minutes slow.  We Missed The Ball Drop.  LMFAO.

We laughed about that for a little while, finished our drinks and said goodnight.  By this time it was nearly 1am, and we had decided to get some rest for our "shopping day" the next day... It occurs to me that I failed to mention that our hotel, is literally right behind the "Settlers Green" Shopping Outlets .. 5 steps away! ... Hilary & I were going to go shopping, and Mike & Ryan were going to spend some time (and eventually more money than Hil OR I) in the arcade.  boys!

Onto "The Moment":

Around 7am, I noticed, through my mostly closed eyes, the bedside table light was on, and Mike was sitting in the chair next to me, mumbling to himself.  Ok creepy?  I turned over and asked what he was doing ... this was his reply:

"I've been up for sometime, trying to figure out the right words to wake you." Pause, Deep Breath "I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I want to know what it's like to wake up beside you and go to bed beside you every day."  

To which I replied:

"What on Earth are you talking about - we live together, you do that every day?!  What are you doing?"

"I'm trying to ask you to marry me, if you'll be quiet!!"

Wait - What?  silence.   By now, I'm more than mostly awake, but not completely.

"OK, so ---go on ... I'm listening"

He takes a deep breath and continues:

"So, will you?  Marry me, I mean?"  and he's suddenly holding a small box.

Dumbfounded, and remember - still somewhat asleep ... my response?

"Can I see the Ring First?"

No Lie.  He laughed, and said, of course - but ... you can't have it until you answer correctly.

I laughed, cried, looked at MY ring, and said of course I will ... I called my mom at a reasonable hour (I think it was 9) .... met Ryan and Hilary for Breakfast ... showed them my ring, Hilary and I cried ... of course, and then we went shopping.

We got married on September 24, 2005.   It was Perfect.  The weather was gorgeous, the dresses, flowers ... everything, just perfect. I promise, I'll blog that too - and when I'm on my own computer, I'll post some pictures of Mike and I, and maybe one of my ring.  Which, by any normal standards is simple - plain - and absolutely stunning.

Through all our ups and downs, our arguments, our fights - and believe me when I say - we have had quite a few knock down drag out fights ... we almost didn't even make it down the aisle.  It has been iffy that we'd last as long as we have - nearly 10 years together, nearly 5 years married .. One child, one built house ... lots of arguments, and disagreements along the way - he is my world, the yin to my yang, to be completely cheesy and steal a completely cheesy line - He Completes Me.

<3 Now That's The Story of Us ... well, part of it.

Two for One!

So I know I blogged already, but since I have this tasty new recipe that I'll be trying Saturday - I thought I'd share it with you (I already shared it with a friends blog, so why not here too??!!)

Stole this from CampbellsKitchen.com or AOL.com actually.

THOUGH I did alter it a little, and added pasta ... I like to put my own spin on things.

Lemon Herb Chicken Primavera

Prep time: 0 minutes
Total time: 25 minutes

Ingredients:
4 - skinless, boneless chicken breasts
1/8 tsp - garlic powder
1 can (10 3/4 oz) - condensed cream of mushroom soup
(you can use either the regular, or the fat free, or 25% less sodium kind, it's your choice)
1/2 cup - milk
1 Tblspn - lemon juice
1/4 tsp - dried basil leaves - crushed
1 bag (16oz.) - frozen vegetables - (it calls for cauliflower, broccoli and carrots - I chose a different mix, carrots, peas, corn, green beans {ETC} because I don't eat broccoli or cauliflower)
1 box (16oz) - bow tie (Farfelle) pasta

Directions:
- Season your chicken with Garlic powder
- Spray skillet with vegetable cooking spray, heat approximately 1 minute
- Add you chicken and cook until brown.
- Add soup, milk, lemon juice, basil and vegetables - heat to a boil.
- Cover and cook over low heat for 10 minutes, or until chicken & vegetables are cooked through.
- While that's cooking - cook your pasta as directed.

Once everything is done, serve the chicken and vegetables over the bow tie pasta and enjoy.

I'm making this Saturday night, I'll add croissants (the garlic butter croissant recipe from a few weeks back) and a white wine - either a White Zin or White Merlot.  (my two favorite wines ... ever.)

What happens when Daddy's at work ...

is secret, and fun, and more than she can handle!

Daddy has taken a second job, to help with some expenses we weren't counting on (snow blower repair from the winter, a flat tire - that needed a new sensor {Love all the new hi-tech crap in cars today}, over 400 dollars worth of food from 2 freezers and the fridge that we lost when we had no power for 5 days ... and a few other bills we weren't anticipating) which means, Mommy & Emi have a ton of fun together, and daddy - sadly - misses out :(  It's not permanent, only a temporary thing .. and necessary, because he doesn't want MOMMY to get the second job, even though I've offered time and time again.

With the weather getting warmer, and the days getting longer - it's getting harder and harder to put Emily to bed at a "decent hour" ... what starts at 7pm - the bedtime routine of brushing our teeth, combing our hair, washing our hands and face, getting into our jammies, reading stories and giving hugs & kisses to say good night (and yes, we do this all together, what Mommy {or daddy} does, Emi does too).  As if we weren't having enough trouble with her and this particular time of night, the added bonus of the sunlight has been helping immensely (note the sarcasm??) often runs until 8 or 8:30pm each night.

Now, don't get me wrong -- I LOVE the longer days, it means I'm not going home in the dark, and we can play outside before dinner ... however, the fights it helps cause with the small one, aren't as much fun as you'd think.   She's a feisty little one that minion!  And it's almost not worth the fight, almost.

So, while daddy has been hard at work (either working side jobs - anyone need any heating work??  or at J&J's .. great food, cute cook!) Mommy and Emi have been making memories, and enjoying our time together before bed.  Sometimes, even though I swore I'd never do it - I lay in our bed with Emily and watch TV until she drifts off to sleep.  It usually doesn't take long, and though I let her lay there for a little while after she falls asleep, I don't do it as often as other parents.  She has a bed, of her own, that she loves and fits snuggly into - we have our bed, that is our space, that she knows she can't ALWAYS sleep in it.

Some of the things we do together, were captured on my camera phone.  Not the greatest photos, but fun to look at none the less.

Eating Dessert - a lollipop that is bigger than her head!  

(Thanks Auntie Jo & Uncle Tommy!!!)

Not all in one sitting either, can you say cavities and belly-ache-city??

Laughing ... sorry it's so dark!!

Making Funny Faces for the Camera 

Eating a hot fudge brownie sundae at J&J's 

(or Daddy's work .. that's downstairs from Momma's)

Yep, that's two spoons in that "little" mouth of hers!!

Good Night Kisses and Love Filled Squidges

I'm sorry I haven't been writing often, I promise to change that as soon as I can.  It's been a battle with focusing, especially with the gorgeous weather, JUST beyond my window!

<3 Thanks for Reading!!

New Month, New State of Mind.

Though I still miss Rufus every single day - and even though I have to continually explain to Emily that he can't come home - but he's still with us in our hearts, it hurts a little less today, than it did yesterday.  

It's getting - not easier - but ... easier, I suppose ... There are days when I feel the pain, more than anything else, there are days when I still think I hear him, or see him, or feel him sitting on the bed, or couch, or even laying on my chest - where he used to sleep.   He will always be my baby.  Always.  And there will always be a hole in my heart where he belongs.  However, the pain is easing, and I have been thinking of him in positive ways - not just that he's gone and won't come back.

Thanks to my very fantabulous friend Jessi, I have the book "The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times (Shambhala Library)" by Pema Chodron.

I have been reading it each night, and to say it makes sense, and it's helpful is one of the biggest understatements of the universe.  

I cannot thank you enough Jessi, for all you've done, and continue to do for me.